School Shootings
What can I say to you, a parent or a grandparent or a caregiver, to allay your fear of school shootings?
1) Know the plan of action at your child’s school. If you’re not satisfied with the plan, let it be known. Somehow, some way, determine if your child knows the plan; the age of the child obviously determines if you should even address the subject. If you choose to, pick the right time, place and approach.
2) Discuss your fear with other parents. The more you can vent the less you’ll feel burdened and alone. You need encouragement as much as your child needs encouragement from you.
3) Increase your faith. If you can’t trust God to protect your child, then why pray? “Say out loud, “God, I think I can handle this situation better than you can” and see if you feel any better.
4. Pray. God answers every prayer. Every one of them. He sees, he listens, and he cares. He may not answer with the answer you desire, but he answers every prayer. “God answers prayer the way I would answer prayer if I knew what God knew.” Surely you agree. Pray with your child when he leaves for school asking for God’s protection. Pray when he returns, thanking God for his grace. Let your child experience the power of prayer.
5) Share your faith, especially with your children. The more you speak your faith, the more you’ll be convinced of its strength or its weakness. More than likely, your child’s faith will surpass yours.
6) Remember that your child is God’s possession. He loans him to you for a little while. As much as you want to claim him as your own, he is not; he is God’s. Be strong. Follow God’s ultimate example of sacrificing his child for us. Heaven forbid we have to. I can’t imagine. But let God be your example to give possession of your child back to him. Whether you can fathom it or not, he loves your child more than you do.
7) Realize how little you can control. Control is an illusion. Realistically, seriously, admittedly, you can only control yourself and someone else to the degree he will allow it, even your child. Does that mean you don’t protect or care for him? Absolutely not! It means that you trust God more than you trust yourself to know what’s best for your child. God wants no child to suffer, but even God gives man free will to harm himself or someone else. Reassuring? Not necessarily, but it’s a fact.
8 Acknowledge that you can’t fix another person’s problems: his mental state, his misbehavior, his age, his maturity level, his home life, his past or his future. Our fears usually center around what we can or cannot control or fix. Truthfully, if you can’t fix it, then it’s not your problem. However, how you respond when it’s beyond your control is.
9) Live in the present moment. Don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow. Don’t look ahead, you’ll worry. Don’t look back, you’ll regret. Life is lived one-hundred percent in the present moment. “A mind that is out of the moment is fertile ground for worry, anxiety, regret, and guilt,” says author Richard Carlson, in his book “You Can Be Happy No Matter What” which I highly recommend. Our worst days come unexpectedly and always in the present moment.
10) Don’t diminish your child’s fears. Address him with compassion, acknowledging that he is not alone. You, as his parent, grandparent or caregiver, knows his needs and how best to meet them, what to say and how. Rest assured.
11) Be the “Kool-Aid mom.” Get involved with your child and his friends. Get to know the strange ones, the mischievous ones, the difficult ones, the loners, the class clowns, the mavericks. Don’t let the suspicious ones go unnoticed and don’t hesitate to be the whistle-blower. You may stop a plan before it ever starts. Listen discreetly to their conversations (that usually means when you’re in the car being the chauffeur) 😊 and make yourself available when the time comes.
12) Live resiliently, not reluctantly. Don’t let the thought, or the possibility of someone harming your child, keep you from living your own. Life goes on, either with you or without you. The very fact that life goes on is what keeps one moving forward when he thinks he can’t go any further.
13) Contact your representative to express your feelings about the laws on gun control. If you disagree with the ones in place, state that you disagree. Currently, the loudest voices are coming from the ones too young to vote—the very targets. Every voice matters. Yes, yours.
14) Accept the fact that man cannot legislate the heart. Evil began in the garden of Eden when God gave man freedom of choice. Man still has that freedom. Accept the fact that evil exists. Acceptance does not always mean approval; it means having the clarity of mind to no longer let fear control you.
1) Know the plan of action at your child’s school. If you’re not satisfied with the plan, let it be known. Somehow, some way, determine if your child knows the plan; the age of the child obviously determines if you should even address the subject. If you choose to, pick the right time, place and approach.
2) Discuss your fear with other parents. The more you can vent the less you’ll feel burdened and alone. You need encouragement as much as your child needs encouragement from you.
3) Increase your faith. If you can’t trust God to protect your child, then why pray? “Say out loud, “God, I think I can handle this situation better than you can” and see if you feel any better.
4. Pray. God answers every prayer. Every one of them. He sees, he listens, and he cares. He may not answer with the answer you desire, but he answers every prayer. “God answers prayer the way I would answer prayer if I knew what God knew.” Surely you agree. Pray with your child when he leaves for school asking for God’s protection. Pray when he returns, thanking God for his grace. Let your child experience the power of prayer.
5) Share your faith, especially with your children. The more you speak your faith, the more you’ll be convinced of its strength or its weakness. More than likely, your child’s faith will surpass yours.
6) Remember that your child is God’s possession. He loans him to you for a little while. As much as you want to claim him as your own, he is not; he is God’s. Be strong. Follow God’s ultimate example of sacrificing his child for us. Heaven forbid we have to. I can’t imagine. But let God be your example to give possession of your child back to him. Whether you can fathom it or not, he loves your child more than you do.
7) Realize how little you can control. Control is an illusion. Realistically, seriously, admittedly, you can only control yourself and someone else to the degree he will allow it, even your child. Does that mean you don’t protect or care for him? Absolutely not! It means that you trust God more than you trust yourself to know what’s best for your child. God wants no child to suffer, but even God gives man free will to harm himself or someone else. Reassuring? Not necessarily, but it’s a fact.
8 Acknowledge that you can’t fix another person’s problems: his mental state, his misbehavior, his age, his maturity level, his home life, his past or his future. Our fears usually center around what we can or cannot control or fix. Truthfully, if you can’t fix it, then it’s not your problem. However, how you respond when it’s beyond your control is.
9) Live in the present moment. Don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow. Don’t look ahead, you’ll worry. Don’t look back, you’ll regret. Life is lived one-hundred percent in the present moment. “A mind that is out of the moment is fertile ground for worry, anxiety, regret, and guilt,” says author Richard Carlson, in his book “You Can Be Happy No Matter What” which I highly recommend. Our worst days come unexpectedly and always in the present moment.
10) Don’t diminish your child’s fears. Address him with compassion, acknowledging that he is not alone. You, as his parent, grandparent or caregiver, knows his needs and how best to meet them, what to say and how. Rest assured.
11) Be the “Kool-Aid mom.” Get involved with your child and his friends. Get to know the strange ones, the mischievous ones, the difficult ones, the loners, the class clowns, the mavericks. Don’t let the suspicious ones go unnoticed and don’t hesitate to be the whistle-blower. You may stop a plan before it ever starts. Listen discreetly to their conversations (that usually means when you’re in the car being the chauffeur) 😊 and make yourself available when the time comes.
12) Live resiliently, not reluctantly. Don’t let the thought, or the possibility of someone harming your child, keep you from living your own. Life goes on, either with you or without you. The very fact that life goes on is what keeps one moving forward when he thinks he can’t go any further.
13) Contact your representative to express your feelings about the laws on gun control. If you disagree with the ones in place, state that you disagree. Currently, the loudest voices are coming from the ones too young to vote—the very targets. Every voice matters. Yes, yours.
14) Accept the fact that man cannot legislate the heart. Evil began in the garden of Eden when God gave man freedom of choice. Man still has that freedom. Accept the fact that evil exists. Acceptance does not always mean approval; it means having the clarity of mind to no longer let fear control you.
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