Called Heavenward
January 15, 2010 Yesterday, I gave my mother permission to die. Monday, she was admitted to T J Samson Hospital with blood clots in both lungs; the doctor said large blood clots. She was taken by ambulance to the ER last Thursday, with the same symptoms as she had Monday when she was admitted; she should have been admitted, but wasn’t. She cannot roll over without help; she cannot sit up without feeling faint; she has not walked across the floor since Monday. Someone has to bathe her, change her, attach her to fifty cords, place an oxygen sensor on her finger to make sure she’s getting the right amount of oxygen to her brain, reposition the oxygen cord when it falls out of her nose, pull the bed rails up to protect her from falling out and, up until today, feed her. She is on blood thinners which are causing her nose to be dry and bleed. Her right hand shakes for some reason unbeknownst to the doctor, causing her food to shake off the fork or spoon whenever she tries to eat by he